The Final Goodbye…

I was up at 6.00am, carried the last few bits of kit out to the bike and got set to go… My mother insisted on making me “a last breakfast” and how could I refuse ?! Naturally, the vibe was a little strained, and the awkward silences between us all were punctuated with deep sighs and little shakes of heads… I could see that despite the fact they had had a long time to prepare for my leaving, they were still struggling with the fact that the day had finally come, when they would have to say goodbye, knowing that they were not likely to see me again until 2013…

Things were a bit of a blur after I got up from the breakfast table: I hardly remember shrugging into my jacket, getting onto the bike; and the ride down to the Margate Beachfront to take photographs for the Herald Newspaper… Charmaine drove my folks down and parked while the shoot took place…and all too soon, we were hugging and kissing… It was going to be another scorcher, and standing about while the photos were taken, had me cooking in my gear…

Just before I settled into the saddle, my parents came up to me and said, “Son, promise us that no matter what happens to any of us, you will not abandon your ride to come home…”…

Thoughts of my Father’s illness swam up into my consciousness and I felt a tightness in my chest as I let the pinpricks behind my eyes become the tears that had threatened to overwhelm me on the way down to the beachfront…

“I’m sorry, Mom… But that’s a promise I can’t make…”, I remember saying… “Take good care of each other, and I’ll see you both in just a few years…”

And then, with a final hug for all, and with my vision blurring, I thumbed the starter, stomped the Big Fella into gear, and with a wave, I was on my way…

The Last Goodbye... Margate Beachfront.

I rode back up the coast to Port Shepstone, and turned onto the N2 to Harding and Kokstad, wanting to get as far along the road as quickly as I could…

Goodbyes can be painful…, often filled with regrets and remorse…, and I’d had too many in too short a space of time over the last few weeks… I had wanted to say so much to my folks and Charmaine before I left, but when the time had come, words had deserted me…

Somewhere close to Harding, I almost turned back… I pulled the bike over to the verge and sat there awhile, gathering my thoughts and reliving the far-too-short farewell we had just endured… I would have liked to have made a less hurried departure, but the heat and the pressure of the photo-shoot had conspired to thwart those plans, and now it was too late… One more regret to add to my collection…

I love you Mom, Dad and Charmaine…. Know that, and draw strength from it if you can….

“I’LL BE BACK…!!!”

"I'LL BE BACK...!!!"

© GBWT 2010