What is it with Donkeys ??

When you’re riding your bike through the countryside of any countries (and even in the cities and towns of some), you are bound to encounter seemingly stray livestock wandering about… In South Africa and other developed countries, they would be considered “stray” if they are not safely ensconced behind a fence… In other less developed parts of the world, where fences are less common, or affordable, they are hardly considered to be “stray”…

On crossing over into Botswana, you will encounter more than your fair share of livestock roaming in close proximity to the  roads you need to ride on…

You will of course see cattle… Cattle are quite easy to avoid, as they are generally slow moving, and telegraph their movements well in advance (unless they are being chased by a moron on horseback, and are in the process of scattering in every direction !!). When cattle have their heads down, you can keep the throttle pegged back and zoom past them. If they have begun crossing the road, then “aim for the tail”… They rarely turn back when they see a car or bike coming, but continue to plod across the road with that far away look in their eyes… It is therefore usually best to try and pass behind them…

Herds of Horses roam the Trans Kgalikadi Highway in Botswana...

Goats are a skittish lot, but probably the most intelligent road users of all the livestock you will encounter on a ride… If they step out onto the road, and see a vehicle or hear a hooter, they will generally run back off the road… I have also noticed that they sometimes even do the “Look right, look left” bit before they cross… They are rarely found “in the middle of nowhere”, and are usually fairly close to a settlement, or in the towns you will pass…

Horse are an unpredictable entity… You definitely need to slow down if there are horses within ten metres of the roadside… They are easily startled and can show a surprising turn of speed when and if they have to… They also tend to bolt first and then decide on a direction later !! If they are on both sides of the road, you had better apply your brakes and slow right down… The ones of the left will run across the road to join the ones on the right, and the one’s on the right will want to join their mates on the left…!! The result ? Mayhem of course ! And if you find yourself in the middle of it, beware !! Horses often run into each other, bumping and shoving, and they can mistake your bike for another horse, which happened to a mate of mine… He had stopped on the road, with the herd split on either side of him… The silly bugger then blew his hooter to see what the horses would do… He quickly found out, when they bolted towards him from both directions, and one of them ran straight into him… He was knocked off his bike and ended up lying underneath it, contemplating the error of his ways…. I encountered many small herds of horses along the highway in Botswana, all in excellent condition and apparently wild…

"You hooting at me, Dude ?"...

Then there are Botswana’s ubiquitous donkeys… Multitudes of the buggers, far outnumbering any other animal you will come across in this country… They come in a variety of colours, from snow white, through every shade of brown, to gray and even jet black…

Years ago, when a foot and mouth outbreak threatened Botswana’s beef exports, thousands of cattle were slaughtered to prevent the spread of the disease… The government at the time, did not have ample funds to compensate all the small time farmers, and replaced their cattle with donkeys… A bad move for road-users !! Many of the farmers received more donkeys than they would ever need, and rather than fence them in, or look after them, they allowed them to roam of their own accord… The only areas you will not find any donkeys, is where the highway passes through a National Park, where these slow moving animals are presumably easy picking for lion and leopard… Apart from that, they are EVERYWHERE !!!

All colours...

Many of them are apparently “wild”, but knock one down, and it’s owner will magically appear to negotiate compensation !!

To me, they seem like the dumbest animals on four legs… They plod about, heads bowed, as if carrying the world on their shoulders. They stand about with a vacant expression in their eyes, in a constant state of apparent indecision…

Just before Sekoma, a herd of six came walking towards me down the highway, right in the middle of my lane… I geared down into neutral, switched off the engine and cruised to a stop, about thirty metres in front of them… The lead donkey continued walking towards me, head bowed, ears hanging loosely alongside it’s slab of a head, and walked right up to the bike… Just when I thought it would actually bump into the front mudguard, it stopped, causing the others to bump into it from behind… It gave the bike a cursory glance, then walked past withing touching distance… I had been dodging their brethren for mile after mile, cursing their apparently stupidity, having to slow right down, and in some places even stop to allow them to get out of the way… With one of them finally so close to me, I couldn’t resist putting my left boot to donkey rump, (it was that close !) which caused it to speed up only marginally for a few metres, before slowing down to it’s former pace… The donkeys behind it had seen my boot shoot out and make contact with their leader, and they took evasive action, giving the Big Fella and I a slightly wider berth…

Objects in the rear view mirror...

I remember how exasperated Allan Karl had become after the umpteenth time we had to take evasive action when encountering all the donkeys on the road down the Panhandle to Maun, in 2008… He had taken every opportunity to interview local officials to discuss the “Donkey Problem”… Despite the fact that at first he thought they were “cute”, by the end of our first day in Botswana, he was describing them in much the same fashion as I was, prefixing the word “Donkey” with a word that sounds like “bucking…”…..

I had left Kang very early on Thursday morning, and nearly hit a pitch black donkey just outside Morwamosu… It was still dark, and despite having my spotlights blazing, and traveling at only 80 km/h, I still saw only the backside of the animal as I passed it…!! A very close call…

Riding through Botswana, and many other places in Africa, requires constant focus and attention to your surroundings… I find myself scanning the roadside about 100 metres in front of me, a few seconds on the left, and then swiveling my eyes to do the same on the right, and then it’s back to the left again… It’s like watching Wimbledon…. the long distance version !! As tiring as this is, it has saved me from colliding with animals on many occasions…

Donkeys that do not use their heads, are likely to lose them to a passing truck...

© GBWT 2010